A man is sitting on a flight from NYC to London. He feels a little cold, so he asks the cabin attendant for a blanket. The cabin crew completely ignores him. On the seat next to him is no other than a parrot.
The parrot screams “get me a scotch on the rocks you stupid cunt”.
Not a moment passes, and the parrot gets a nice glass of whiskey. The man asks for a blanket again only to be ignored.
“Hey, old cow” yells the parrot “where’s my snacks?”
Peanuts, cashews and salted almonds find themselves immediately on the parrot’s tray.
The man gives up “I’m freezing you stupid bitch. What the hell do I need to do to get a fuckin’ blanket on this shit of a flight?!”
The flight attendant says something into a comm system and a big man comes, opens the door at 37,000ft and throws both the man and the parrot out of the plane.
On the way down, the parrot takes a good look at the man and says: “you know something? You’re pretty brave for someone with no wings”